Malaika: Learning to Love Myself

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Malaika, 16, is in grade ten at Sea Point High and has been a member of UNITE for the past two years. Her involvement has taught her a lot about the importance of confidence and self-love.

Discovering the Beauty of Integration

Malaika was born in Cape Town and raised in Gugulethu. She joined UNITE two years ago, and it has played quite a significant role in shaping Malaika’s social life at Sea Point High. “Before UNITE, I never thought I would be friends with people who aren’t black. I have been surrounded by black people my whole life, so I just expected to feel a connection with black students more than others.”

Malaika went on to explain that the topics she was introduced to through UNITE shifted her worldview. “We talk about integration and it has opened my mind to a lot of things. Here at school, you find different kinds of people who segregate themselves from each other. UNITE has given me the confidence to get up and talk to them. Now, I am open to having relationships with people I would not see in my own community.” 

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“Hearing what people say about you can determine how you feel about yourself, when you should be in charge of that. I had to realise that there is much more to life than being a certain size, or getting likes on Facebook and Instagram. If I’m going to base my life on that, I’m not going to live my life the way I want.”

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Change Starts From Within

High school has challenged Malaika beyond just engaging with her peers. UNITE has taught her to continuously question her actions and beliefs. 

“In grades eight and nine, I dealt with a lot of self-image problems, to the point that I became a vegetarian.” Malaika blames the media for instilling the pressure she felt to look a certain way. However, UNITE ignited meaningful dialogue that taught her to prioritise her own ideals over socially-imposed ones. 

“Hearing what people say about you can determine how you feel about yourself, when you should be in charge of that. I had to realise that there is much more to life than being a certain size, or getting likes on Facebook and Instagram. If I’m going to base my life on that, I’m not going to live my life the way I want.”

Malaika’s self-assurance can be observed in casual conversation, but she mentions that exuding confidence has not come naturally. She describes coping with judgement and negativity as an intimate process. “When you’re at home, sitting in your room dealing with these things, you look into the mirror and see it’s just you. When it comes to dealing with what people say, it’s just you.”

Practicing What You Preach

Malaika plans to spread the importance of seeking self-validation to her younger peers. She is doing so by starting an organisation whose sole purpose is to encourage girls to be comfortable and confident in their own skin. She plans to facilitate group discussions and build a community of support for girls who face similar struggles.

Furthermore, Malaika’s ambition extends beyond the halls of her school. In the future, she plans to become a human rights activist, and to advocate for the rights of marginalised individuals. Equipped with her tenacity and drive, Malaika is sure to find success wherever she turns.

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“Now, I am open to having relationships with people I would not see in my own community.” 

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